Alcohol fumes. Binary
code. Computers that identify liars. Welcome to the ABC of communication...
The queues at the hospitals and dispensaries were unending.
The morgue was contemplating two-seater accommodation to fit in all the new
arrivals. Classes that taught breathing techniques were huffing and puffing,
trying to control the crowds.
The reason was simple - email apnoea. In other words, people
simply forgot to breathe when they were keying in emails. The mother of all
apnoeas – sleep apnoea – helps strangle the body's oxygen supply so that it can
come out of its restful state and fight any imminent danger. But why email
apnoea? Was it technology's way of getting you out of your reverie so that you
didn't send any objectionable mail that you subconsciously typed - much like Gmail's
math problem that you needed to solve to prove that you were not drunk when
sending that late night mail?
So, was it better to hyperventilate than to vent online? This
question led the social activists - fighting for human rights - and the social
media activists, who demanded a better communication system, to protest, claiming
that e-mail was killing people. Soon the hunt for an alternate mode of staying
in touch took epic proportions. Then came the nerds. "Why can't we simply
stick to SMS, IM or social media?" they demanded. "Aren't these the
most common communication platforms today?" The geeks however, outsmarted
them with a new research, stating that a computer had figured out how to spot a
liar through digital messages - he was the one who was taking longer than the
rest to respond.
“Since most users assume an alternate identity or create a
fake profile, it's very easy to be misled - that makes it imperative to come up
with a better system,” they claimed. As soon as the research emerged, the
deceptive kinds joined in the search as well, as they didn't want to be
identified and thereby lose their edge in life. (“Apparently, 54% of all lies can
be detected by humans, but what's to tell how long we can be safe in that 46%
zone?”)
Finally, two researchers decided to drown their sorrows in
vodka - and in a flash, figured out that they could use the spirit to send text
messages. (Nope, they were not drunk.) It was a case of sending the message in
spurts and demodulating the same at the other end. Alcohol molecules were sent
across a distance in binary code, so their presence would indicate ‘one’ and
their absence, zero. In scientific terms, it was the world's first text message
created and transmitted using molecular communication, but in pure tech terms,
it was a vodka-soaked sms, which was much to cheer about.
"Big deal! We've always been obsessed about the birds
and the bees, so what's different now?" claimed the critics. Apparently,
certain species of seabirds and bees had also been using similar communication
techniques. Besides, the concept of sending alcohol vapours in spurts to communicate
a message was a lot like the smoke signals used by Red Indians, which enabled
them to make a point even across large distances.
Something new had to be done. It looked like technology was
not really on the money when it came to facilitating effective communication.
The new system had to be robust, be free of any health hazard, not involve
alcoholic spirits (why waste good liquor?) and shouldn't have been practised by
birds and animals before.
Finally a little boy spotted an empty bottle rolling around
aimlessly. It was the same one that had held the vodka used for the text
message experiment. 'Perhaps this will help,' thought the boy as he wrote a little
note, asking the recipient of the message to suggest a new way of
communication. He then rolled the note, shoved it into the bottle, closed it
and threw it into the sea.
And that is how the ‘message in a bottle’ came to be.
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